Who are these Guys?

I meet this guy online and after exchanging a few e-mails he decides to impress me with an article he recently wrote about his singles dance experience. I thought I might share it with you and let everyone enjoy the stellar men available online, is he sane? Hmmmm "BLOCK"

OHHHH HOLY FRIGHTNIGHT!
Saturday, July 4, 2009

I don’t have the courage to revisit the experience…What I have written contains only a small tasteful explanation of last night:

As you walk up to pavilion at the park….All eyes are on you….You feel them like lasers burning into your soul…from the female side “Hmmmmm new meat” and from the Male side “Danger Will Robinson….Competition approaching…run Will Robinson…run Dr. Smith!

There you are standing, looking at all the eyes, expecting one set of them would at least welcome you.
My mind was called back to earlier in the morning when I said to myself…You know Jim….everyone has just got to experience just one of these.
I was then called up to driving to the outing…I found it difficult to steer with one hand and a gun pointed at my head in the other….Yes I had forced myself at gunpoint to go.
It was then that I came to the conclusion…..THE GUN WASN”T BIG ENOUGH!!!!

It was like being sucked back into my body from a dreamlike state…There I was still standing in front of 30+ people and several kids. I put out my hand and introduced myself to 3 people…a guy and a gal walked away…The other gal looked at me like I had just asked to “bed her grandmother”…slowly she shook my hand and said he name was “Ella Marie” or something like that.
I can tell you I showered, shaved, and carefully picked out a nice looking wardrobe…..I would have felt more at home and fit in better if I hadn’t showered, nor shaved and shown up in a G-String and Pastes!

Needless to say…it went downhill from there…It was just like the Julia Roberts marriage to Lyle Lovett…..You just said to yourself “THIS IS NOT RIGHT!!!”

I have been in a 24 hour tailspin…I think I have finally hit bottom! A Mormon Meat Market Singles Bar B Q in IDAHO!!!!
I believe now that THERE IS NO GOD! Not even a God with a Perfect Sense of Humor would do that to anyone!
As I walked back to the safety of my car (after the festivities were buried) I thought to myself….

Hmmmm…My wife, My kids, and Now my God has walked out on me, Right when I was in need of them most…..”Sounds like it’s time for a Cherry Coke!”

Was you experience anything like this one?!?!?!?

XXXX

PS it was good to hear from you! Thank You

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Text Messaging

So this last month I received my cell phone bill and noticed I had gone over my text message limit for the month and was billed an additional $14. I was shocked and didn't believe that I could go over my 1000 texts a month. For heaven sakes I'm not some teenage girl who uses more acronyms than words. As I started thinking about it I realized that yes my text messages have increased and that the dating game is to blame.

Texting is becoming a standard for communication and a short simple way to contact somebody just to say hi, hello, what 'cha doing, and would you like to go out with me. It's quick and simple and men are using it more and more for communication. I laughed at text message man when he first asked me out that way but now I realize that he's not alone in his endeavours. I've been asked out, dumped, stood up, flirted, rescheduled, thanked and kissed all through my cell phone. It's instant communication and for the most part you know people will get it. Even in meetings, even on dates, and even just across the room.

Although at first I was a little opposed to it because I think it's a more intimate form of communication, I've found that I have accepted it. I'll reply back as to not be rude and I'm sure that's the additional $14 that I'll be paying this month. I might have to change my plan to just to accommodate the day and age but truly want my life to be simple. What happened to the good old days when you had to stop by for a visit and talk face to face. I like not being able to be reached and sometimes, and depending on the person, that's a really good thing.

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Heartache is inevitable in dating. You like someone and they don't like you. Someone likes you and you don't like them. You have secret crushes, you fall in love, and their response back isn't what you have hoped. It's the dating game and though it isn't fun it is necessary to risk that pain for joy that could be yours in the future.

I do believe in love. There is nothing wrong with it. Although I don't need a man in my life, I certainly want and welcome one into it. I don't look too hard for it but when it happens I appreciate it. I don't fall in love easily and recently something of the sort happened to me. I liked the guy.....I honestly did. I fell in love despite my mind pulling me in the opposite direction. I knew he wasn't into me from the beginning. His actions proved that to me but yet I still wanted to give it a chance. Why? Because I'm not going to regret letting any guy go without thoroughly knowing he's not the one for me.

A friend used to tell me in college that within three dates you know if you could have a future with that person. I used to laugh and tell him that it was impossible to get to know someone in that time. However this second time around, I see it so much differently. I'm not into passing time and yes, within three dates and the right questions I can tell if there would be a future.

Now my recent heartache proves that risk is still involved. It doesn't mean that there will be a future on date #4 but it does mean that I'm continuing for a reason. I've passed time with so many men in my life and nothing beneficial came from it. I don't need a man, I just appreciate love. I'm a long term, loyal kind of girl and I'm not going to make the same mistake twice. I went on one too many dates with my ex-husband only because I didn't want the burden of causing him heartache. I can appreciate being dumped, the niceties that go along with it, not knowing the true reasons, second guessing yourself.....etc. etc. I just wish it didn't hurt so bad. But that indeed is the dating game and that's where I am in life. I'll risk the pain for the eternal joy that the future may hold.

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LDS Dating Sites

There are so many online dating sites geared to the single LDS person. Though I have only been on a few I found a good review of many at the following link. It saves time when somebody else has done the work. Check it out and let us know what you think and what you like and dislike about online dating.

http://lds.about.com/od/ldsdatingsites/tp/10_lds_dating.htm

My favorite is LDS singles but more than likely because it's easy and not too complicated of a website. I like sites simple to the eye and easy to understand. LDS planet seems to have many members but I'm not currently a member so what's the point.

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Lets Talk CoDependency

This may not be the best or most entertaining entry I have or will ever make, but I need to cover it because it is a part of my life and "single" journey.
The first time someone mentioned codependency to me in regards to myself was about 2 years ago in my counselors office. No way, I am not codependent and I dismissed it... Until my divorce and I started looking at it again in a different light, with my counselor. At the same time a good friend gave me a book and I am now in it's second reading, Codependent No More by Melody Beattie. The first time with an orange hi liter and this time a yellow one. I also found a packet given to me called "thinking errors". I tell you all of this so you can begin to understand my journey in emotional healing and maybe it will touch one of you and help you along your path as well.
After my divorce, I realized that I had very little personal identity left. I couldn't remember if the things I liked were because they were my likes or because they were part of my marriage or part of the person that I was expected to be. I could not seem to make a solid decision and did not trust my choices, I felt a very real whole in my heart and in my life. I was lonely and desperate to replace or rebuild the dream I once had. Rebuilding the dream I had has to start with a very strong, happy and whole person one that is okay with herself. This is the journey I am on now and am feeling so happy to be working on me.
So what is codependency? "An emotional, psychological, and behavioral condition that develops as a result of an individuals prolonged exposure to, and practice or, a set of oppressive rules-rules which prevent the open expression of feeling as well as the direct discussion of personal and interpersonal problems". "Caretaker", "A person who has let another person's behavior affect him or her, and who is obsessed with controlling that person's behavior". "guilt", "codependents want to help but probably died thinking they didn't do enough and were feeling guilty".
I hope this will be the first of several entries I will make on this subject as I grow and change and work toward becoming the new and amazing woman I have the ability to be.

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